Monday, December 10, 2007

Things aren't always what they seem

My family is poor.
I go to a rich school (purely on scholarships).
People at a rich school expect you to have some sort of money.
I've accepted that fact and even though I still feel weird around certain people or conversations, i'm learning to deal with it and know that they just don't know.
I'm not getting anything for Christmas.
That doesn't bother me at all.
I get to go home, see my family and friends, and I'm so happy about that.
But I know when I come back to school, everyone will ask what I got for Christmas and my birthday.
My answer will be nothing.
I'll get something from my sister, I'll probably get $75 from my grandparents, but that'll be it.
And then they'll give me a look of pity and embarassment but quickly substitute their shock with, "Oh that's cool!" unless they're insanely straightforward and say, "That's all?"
This has happened before in Junior High and HIghschool, and it was kind of embarassing, but I got over it.
But here?
I'm dreading it.
Preacher's kids, doctor's kids, whatever's kids...
they have money.
I guess it's sort of fun to shock them with how poor I am.
Shock-value is always fun.
But I don't really want shock value this year.
I just don't want them to ask.

2 comments:

leanna said...

there's almost no such thing as a poor american.

Kasey said...

Hey, it doesn't actually matter.
At least you love the company of your family.
Money could never fix mine. :-) ha.
You're the coolest, do you know that?
I know you'll have an awesome Christmas despite presents, and that is something to be applauded.
Love.